I'll be waiting.

like in a month time.

am i prepared ? NO.

i feel so useless now.

in class, especially add maths and physics,

where i always got lost and stuffs.

really feel like breaking down.

and now, what am i doing here ?

wasting time blogging.

i know i need time organization.

i know i need it badly.

there's only one chance, ONCE CHANCE of scoring high in my trails.

and now, the chances are getting smaller and smaller,

as im getting lazier every single day.

my set of goals,

are getting further and further due to my laziness.

i really dont know what to do anymore.

but whats hurting me now,

wasn't just the pressure, but it was something else.

i was wondering , there's not much topics in between us.

to some people, yes , we always laugh and stuffs when we're together.

but, im really worried, will that laughter maintain ?

i know its easy to love someone, but its really hard to maintain it.

most of the problems start from communication.

where both sides start to loose topics to talk about .

then, all silent.

i don't wanna imagine that, i really don't .

i'm always getting busy with all my stuffs,

and , honestly, i have no idea what is he doing there.

but i know, it'll be a pretty boring job to do, to just sit and look everyday.

i understand.

the pressures are getting really tight lately,

and with all those stupid projects ,

and my own selfish / laziness around me ,

its driving me nuts already.

i dont wanna get all those tensions , depression and stuffs.

what should i do ?

i really need someone to help me out now.

i need someone to talk to.

but my number first listener had slept,

and i do not know how to tell him.

i don wanna hear u saying "i will wait "

coz i know its not fair for you.

all i need is,

support and love.

but, somehow , i dont feel it now.

or was it because i didnt give much ?

ok, i lied.. love yes....

but support ? i cant find anyone =/

is there anyone that can understand my situation now ?

i wanna make it fair,

i wanna make it balance,

thats all.

i guess, i needa sleep now.

i needa think about it.

and plan for my daily "activity" tomorrow.

nights people.

night baby.